#3 Elizabethtown

Okay, so last night I wanted to get through another movie on the list, but at the same time, I wasn’t really in the mood to invest 2 hours in a movie, so I wanted something as non-committal as possible. This movie is one of Charm’s favourites, so I thought I’d watch it and see what the fuss is all about.

Elizabethtown is quite possibly one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. If someone held a gun to my head and said that I had to watch Plan 9 From Outer Space or Elizabethtown again or else he’d kill me, I’d have to seriously weigh up the pros and cons of each option.

Quite ironic is one of the first lines in the movie:

There’s a diffrence between a failure and a fiasco. A failure is merely the absence of success. Any fool can achieve failure. But a fiasco, a fiasco is a disaster of epic propotions. A fiasco is a folk tale told to other’s to make other people feel more alive because it didn’t happen to them.

touche, Cameron Crowe, touche.

I fell asleep at several points in this movie. There wasn’t really a single thing I liked about this movie. I can’t stand Orlando Bloom as an actor (I’m still convinced that he was actually born a woman), and I can’t stand Snaggletooth – both ugly and untalented. How is she still getting work?

I didn’t like it for the main reason that I found the entire movie and everything in it to be unbelievable. There’s no way that shit like that would happen, and that the people around those events would react in those ways. I’m calling shenanigans on that entire movie

I give it zero stars.